This was the first time I ever called my shrink just because I had to talk to someone. I've never done that before. I feel needy and annoying.
My medications have changed and I think it is causing problems. I don't know just what to do about that save to try and endure until things get better. Ultimately, that is my entire life of late endure in hopes something improves. If the universe would just accommodate me and improve itself
I have had the urge to write more strongly than I have felt it in years yet I find myself unable to write either poetry or prose. It used to be a release of sorts for me but I so seldom find myself filled these days that this particular spillway seems unneeded. I can hear the cracks now yes, I know you've always thought that I was full (of it) it is bad when I set myself up for this shit.
My son is visiting from Florida. He will be here a week. I am glad to see him. This is more or less the best and worse possible time for him to be here. <sigh>It is best because gods know I need somebody around and worst because he is seeing me at my worst. </sigh>