June 11th, 2001

nanowrimo 2010

Making appointments this morning

Will see my Opthalmologist (Doctor Luke) on Wednesday at 10:00 am. My eyes are sensitive to light and I'm not able to change focus well. I am becoming concerned about driving and may not drive the rest of the week.

I have scheduled a Friday visit to Doc Aruba as well. Showdown time. I'm taking way to many medicines and don't know what they're doing. I have to change this.

nanowrimo 2010

VIsitor from distant lands

His Bobness is in town. Nice to see someone from Floridia. We'll have lunch at Perkins today and I'll enjoy conversation that doesn't somehow involve a tractor or car parts. Yee Haw!
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nanowrimo 2010

My so called life sucks.

I spent the lunch hour with the Mighty Bob, Mahatma of the Mainframe. It was distressing. He is not a kid anymore but he seemed like a young man to me. I used to hang out with teenagers in my fifties and fit right in. I couldn't keep up with Bob. Honestly I had trouble following some of his conversation. He's too fast for me now. I hadn't realized.

That's bullshit. I was about to say I hadn't realized how far I've fallen, but I know absolutely how far. My mind is like a steel trap. A rusty steel trap. It snapped shut a while ago and will take a prybar and a bath in graphite to open it up again.

Damn. I didn't think I'd mind getting old. "You're only as old as you feel." What a contemptible lie.

When did it happen? When did I start falling behind? I guess Seattle was my last gasp. I nearly got away. From there I was going to Australia. It may be that the land down under was just a fantasy. Maybe it was, but I fully intended to go. Now I don't fully intend to do anything. I nearly got away.

I'm appalled at the state of my mind. I used to keep up on the latest in a dozen areas. I don't even read anymore. I re-read fiction. Fiction! That I've already read! Why? I don't teach. I don't learn. My idea of being informed is the Drudge Report and weather.com. Gods, when did it happen? My idea of a good time these days is when I run across some quirky article with a spin on it to post to Badvogato. With someone else's spin. The quirks used to be mine or at least applied by me.

This is depressing.