Karl (louderback) wrote,

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Catching up

I have been working on this update for 4 days now:
I've been neglecting my writing for some time. I have doggedly maintained my habit of producing at least one lugubrious poem every day. I 've plans to add them to my web site eventually, but not any time soon. They, mostly, deal with my vision and my angst associated therewith. It is stressful reading, so I don't want to overwhelm or overstress, or trigger, or whatever.
I'm not sure where my writing has gone in recent months. I used to write a great deal of fiction. I wrote fantasy, science-fiction, even horror. I was fond of alternate-history in my reading, but never got around to writing any, though I planned half a dozen stories.

I have been trying to continue some of the stories I've written but have had no success. I've tried some of those techniques for breaking writer's block to no avail. New projects seem to go nowhere. I am very frustrated by not being able to write, by not having the release I used to get from writing.

I'm going to concentrate on other media for a while, trying to listen to more tapes, getting more movies from Netflix

I'm not sure what I can do to get back some equivalent to things that are gone from my life. I have a bad problem with this particular issue just now. I used to "zone out" when writing, an entirely associative process. Reading was a tremendous escape mechanism for me. When reading I would "be somewhere else" for a while. Music never provided that release for me. Though I truly enjoy music it never gave me that opportunity to escape that I found in reading and in movies.

Peripheral Stuff

I've been thinking a lot of late about my inability to read. The lack of new input is a problem for me apart from the frustration at the lack of escape that I used to get from reading.

Reading provided for me an "escape" that I have not been able to replace in my life. The same is true of writing. I have also lost this aspect of my life in movies. Which is to say that Movies used to include this form of escape and no longer does.

I am trying very hard to find some new avenues to explore, but I have been pretty diligent in exploring things so far. It has been two years since this need appeared, and over a year since I recognized it. I don't know what more I can do

Stupid Quiz: What is the Dominant Inner being within You?

The Magus
The Magus. The real world bores you as you know
that there is more that can be seen in the
metaphysical world. You dance through dreams,
Consider the cosmos and see eight sides to
every four sided object.


My payroll department called and told me they had shorted me three days pay in the last month and that the money would be forthcoming on the next check. Thank whatever gods there are, it will be a real help.


I wuv my widdle doggie! I am really enjoying my pet. She is a beautiful animal and well behaved generally. She has become my alarm clock. For over 30 years I have awakened at about 5:30, alarm or none. Now I find that I am learning to sleep late. I seldom have the opportunity to do so, as Jirel has learned that she has the ability to make me get out of bed. This is generally accomplished by barking, licking whatever part of me might be exposed, and, as a last resort, jumping up on the bed and lying down on me. I am very pleased that she has housebroken herself.

For a couple of weeks my sister's dog Nicky has been here. Nicky is an older dog, about seven years. She and Jirel fought a bit at first, but things smoothed out quickly and they played together well. It was a good combination, I think. Nicky was a playmate for Jirel and Jirel got Nicky to be more active... a good combination. My sister picked up Nicky and took her home last week. I was not home when she left, so she locked the place up and left Jirel inside. Jirel's usual punishment of me, when I make her unhappy in some fashion, is to tip over the trash basket near my chair and tear up a kleenex... it's really not all that severe. This time Jirel must have been quite upset at being left alone. She tipped over the basket, and cleaned off my chair-side table. Unfortunately one of the items on that table was a squeeze bottle of betadine antiseptic. Jirel chewed a hole in that and got iodine on my carpet. This stain has been resistant to all efforts to eradicate it.

My pest of a doggie is really getting on my nerves today. She has dug under the fence and gets into the neighbor's yard. I've bought a stake and chain, but it is inconvenient for me and for her. I must figure out how to keep her in the yard. I had to retrieve her from a neighbor's yard today. This caused me to fall and hurt my back. I missed a doctor's appointment over the whole thing. To make matters worse, the fall led to her escaping again and my having to walk the neighborhood to retrieve her.


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