Karl (louderback) wrote,

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Chili Day

My attempt to write was a complete failure. I wanted to do a character introduction in but bled out after a paragraph or so. *sigh*

The rest of the weekend was uneventful. Weather says that next week will be cooler.

I updated my resume over the weekend and added another one to Monster. Gee, I'm excited about that . . . it took me only three weeks to something that should have taken an afternoon. *sigh*

Much of the weekend I listened to Final Victim by Stephen J. Cannell. It took me about eight weeks to finish. It's only four tapes, but I found it very slow going. The story was OK, if a bit unbelievable. I thought some of the characterizations hit the bulls-eye. I must remember to return the book to Susie at Alphapointe

Today, I'll be cooking Chili di Karlo and serving everyone lunch. I plan to serve chili in a bowl, chili-dogs and chili-mac. It won't be very hot, but I think people'll like it. I'll post my recipe to when I get a chance. I've got almost all my recipes in html pages these days. I will probably add them them my site.

Today at Alphapointe should be fun. I could use one of those. It still seems like things are drawing away or drawing to a close or something. I get the impression that the staff thinks I'm going to lodge a complaint or something. I don't know what they expected of my visit here - I expected to learn ways to do the job I was holding. That didn't happen, but I didn't really expect them to wave some sort of magic wand, just to discuss strategies. We've done that and I've accomplished pretty much what I set out to do. I've learned a lot of braille in a short time. I've practiced my white cane skills and had a chance to discuss adaptive tech with people who know what is available.

I wish I could discover something that would help me learn more quickly and retain more from tape, but the consensus seems to be that there is nothing much to do but wait.

I'm getting a lot of that lately. I am just having a great deal of trouble getting my mind around the idea that if I just wait long enough I'll come to terms with my state of affairs and maybe even begin to like it. The idea that one of these days I'll enjoy the level at which I'm functioning is nightmarish to me. I'd much prefer they do the lobotomy now and spare me the devolution process. To do a thing in a mediocre fashion is mediocrity whether or not I like it, whether or not I accept it. I type 30 or 40 words a minute. That is average. It is not particularly good at all. I used to type faster. Now it is the best I can do. Is there any objective measure by which my current typing speed is anything but average? The fact that I was faster pisses me off massively. My acceptance that I'm going to type this speed isn't going to change the fact that it is nothing special. I'm not going to begin to believe that it is praiseworthy or an achievement.

Gaak. I've begun to rant.


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